It takes a village to raise a family, right? Well, what about a home with two social workers and an older sister and her boyfriend?
I found myself stuck in a family situation a couple of days ago with tensions raised and cheeks flustered. However, there was one thing on my mind: I needed to do an assignment, but I couldn’t do it by myself.
TL;DR – I have a hard time asking people for help.
It’s been a thing for many years, which through multiple sessions of self-reflection, has boiled down to this. I don’t like to bother people, and I’m disappointed when they disappoint me. However, it’s been through hygge that I’ve recognized how important it is to try again, to build your community bit by bit every day.
After asking multiple people to help me, only my sister and her boyfriend could help me with my assignment, but they needed to help other people first. One of the obstacles in their way to help was using my parent’s trailer to haul something to the dump. The only problem was that the trailer was covered in snow with a bank in front blocking it. My dad had left for the day, and so it was my mom and me, thinking about my assignment and hoping that we could get it done before I had to leave for the evening. All of a sudden, my mom says:
“We are a family, which means we help each other out. I’m going to go dig the trailer out, and you can help if you want. We need to help each other.”
Five minutes later, my mom and I are furiously digging away at the ice and snow-covered trailer. Fifteen minutes later, the trailer was out of the snow and in the driveway, ready to use. I was feeling something I hadn’t felt in awhile – fulfillment, without resentment, of having done something for someone else to help the overall situation. My sister and her boyfriend were pleased with our efforts, and a couple hours later, their job was completed, and I got my homework done on time.
So what does hygge got to do with it?
Hygge is about many things, but one of the best parts of it is recognizing your people. It’s about realizing how important it is to have people that support you no matter what. It’s been surveyed that hygge is maximized with four to five people, rather than by yourself or with a large group of people. Guess you could say it comes back to being a tribal thing. My tribe is my parents, my sister, her boyfriend, and my boyfriend and I’m very okay with that. My tribe is also with my friends but unfortunately, I’m unable to see them all the time. When you learn about who your tribe consists of, for better or for worse, you can unleash a whole new world of hygge filled with all the cozy teas you can think of.